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Let Me Tell You a Story

Sat, 28 Aug 2010 Source: Bonsu, Akua

*Akua Bonsu [email protected] *

Once upon a time there was an illiterate dictator. Because he had a gun

amidst intellectuals who did not have any, he was able to lord it over them

for almost two decades. In the process, he put down his army uniform and

became the president of Ghana. He ruled the country with a bunch of ‘yes

men’ and ‘yes women’ again because he had a gun and was prepared to use it.

If one had a different opinion from this illiterate dictator, one kept it to

one’s self. In fact, when this dictator was unhappy with some judges who

invariably fell in the intellectual category, those judges were abducted and

murdered.

Almost three decades later, it is modern day Ghana and slowly but surely,

the intellectual population has grown. This ballooning section of the

population has gradually chipped away at the impact of guns and their use to

settle political scores. The world has grown smaller so the international

community pays closer attention to the goings-on in Ghana and other

developing countries. So now in Ghana, one has to use the courts, the

judicial system if one wants to settle political scores. And those ladies

and gentlemen of the judiciary, they don’t play with the responsibilities

bestowed upon them by the constitution. Those looking to settle political

scores must come prepared.

But alas, that is where the problem begins with the descendants of this

illiterate dictator. They call something a political party. They heard the

news somewhere so they formed one of their own. What they failed to realize

is that once you go down that road, you have to behave properly. When you

disagree with someone, you have to sit down and discuss a solution. But

don’t blame them; they cannot shake their heritage. As the other political

party abides by this simple regulation of amicably ironing out their

differences, these descendants of the illiterate dictator use knives,

cutlasses, and guns to still settle their differences even if they occur

amongst themselves.

Anyway, recently they accidentally found themselves in charge of the affairs

in Ghana. Almost two years later, they still have not figured out how to run

the nation. So in order to look good in the eyes of the people of Ghana,

they have decided to make members of the other party look bad – just like

them. But they can only do so if they can successfully use the judiciary to

throw some members of the other party in jail – just like those other people

were able to do. But then they have run into those learned men and women in

robes who take their responsibilities very seriously.

One after the other, their ill-prepared cases were thrown out of the

courtrooms. If you have always used weapons and intimidations to settle your

political scores, the courtroom can be a very strange place to be. The all

of a sudden one of them – their chairman went and had himself a good drink

of a concoction called “akpeteshie.” One shot of that stuff can make

intelligent men sound very silly. If a not so intelligent man drinks that

stuff, keep him away from a microphone. Oh but they did not. And when he

opened his mouth, like the white man would say, “all hell broke loose,”

meaning the whole nation went crazy.

The lawyers, the teachers, the other people, the students, the seamstresses,

even the palm wine tappers all told him to keep quiet and apologize to those

men and women who take their responsibilities very seriously. But these

descendants of the illiterate dictator, you must give it to them; even when

they are wrong, they have to move forward in the hopes that they would

eventually become right. Even when their leader, who is also the leader of

our nation saw that this palaver is too much so he had to distance himself

from it, the rest of them still continued to try and prove that they are

right.

Oh did I mention that they are also very good at lying? My apologies. They

lie so much that when they tell you to look up, look down or else, a big

insect will enter your eyes. In fact, their very name is a lie. Their name

suggests that all their members have a say in what goes on in that party

whereas their master – the illiterate dictator is the one who always have

the final word. Anyway, when they knew that one of the political scores they

are trying to settle in a courtroom was not going well, they lied about the

judge that they have recorded his voice as he said something inappropriate.

When they were called to task to bring the recording, they started making

all kinds of excuses, and have not been able to bring the recording.

Oh but those descendants of the illiterate dictator, they don’t give up. You

see, when they lied about that judge, he stepped aside away from that case.

So they think they have discovered an antidote to their troubles in the

courtroom. Now they want to spread lies about one very powerful woman. She

is the one who decides which of those learned men and women gets to be the

judge of cases they bring to the courtroom to settle political scores. If

spreading lies worked on one learned man, it can certainly work on another

learned woman. May be she would step aside also so that the way would be

paved for them to replace her with one of their men to do their dirty work

for them.

But this woman, the leader of all the men and women who take their

responsibility very seriously, she is very strong. She is strong in

personality and in character. In other places where they respect these men

and women who take their responsibilities very seriously, they make them so

powerful that no one, not even their president can remove them. They leave

when they want to leave. So they make their decision without being afraid

that they would be removed from office if they make some powerful person

angry.

Not Ghana. In Ghana, those men and women who take their responsibilities

very seriously can be removed. In fact the big book of our country

says “Justice

of the Superior Court or a Chairman of the Regional Tribunal shall not be

removed from office except for stated misbehavior or incompetence or on

ground of inability to perform the functions of his office arising from

infirmity of body or mind.” (Article XI Chapter 146 Clause 1). Ahaaa, that

is why their drunken leader said if the learned men and women do not clean

themselves, they would clean do the cleaning for them. So these people can

really remove any of the learned men and women that they do not like.

Oh but they lie bad. That iron lady leader of the learned men and women will

no quit. She would not be cajoled into stepping aside; they would have to

drag her kicking and scratching so that the whole world would know that when

they could not score a goal, they moved the goal post closer. That is the

only way those descendants of the illiterate dictator can succeed in the

strange place called the courtroom. Hopefully by that time, Ghanaians would

have had the chance to correct their mistake. What mistake? Oh, the one they

made in December of 2008 when they voted out the people they said were

arrogant and brought in the people who would kill them. And now that they

have seen the people who would kill them actually killing them, I am sure

they would not mind dealing with the other people who they thought were

arrogant.

Bye Bye!

Columnist: Bonsu, Akua