Remember that dating single mothers lands you in multiple types of relationships all at the same time. Your presence can have a major effect in both positive and negative aspects and it’s important to consider things as the relationship moves forward.
As you enter a serious relationship with her, it is important to establish a healthy relationship with both your romantic partner and her children. Before you start to date a single mom consider these facts.
1. Accept That Her Children Are Her First Priority To think of this in honest terms, her children were in her life first. She has known them much longer than she has known you, and she likely has a much stronger bond with her children than she does with you.
As harsh as it may sound, her children are her priority and this should be respected. You will earn your place in the family with time, but you should always recognize the fact that her children are her priority.
2. When Dating a Single Mom, Stay Flexible This move requires flexibility, from co-parenting with her children’s father to constantly rescheduling after the first date. As a mom, your partner is very likely juggling a lot more than she can handle. This is why one of the most important rules when dating a single mom is to always stay flexible.
3. Be Upfront About Commitment As a parental figure, your partner does not have the time or energy to be led on. If they want to date you, they are most likely looking for an active commitment. Of course, there are always exceptions to the rule; however, being upfront about your commitment or lack of commitment will show her respect. Mature women dating aren’t necessarily looking to hook someone into marriage. However, they do expect you to be honest about your commitment.
4. Take It Slow When Dating a Single Mom Remember that when dating a single mom, she’s most likely going to be incredibly busy due to her kids. Be a supportive potential partner and trust that the relationship will move forward at its own pace. So long as you don’t look for a lot too soon.
5. Remember That She’s More Than a Mom Whether you just started dating her, or you’ve been with her for a long time, remember to see her as a woman, not a mom. A lot of people tend to forget that moms are more than just mothers. They’re your potential partner, a strong independent woman, and so much more.
6. Get to Know Her Kids There is a reason you are dating this woman, so consider how the kids feel about this. In the beginning, as you are introduced to them, be sure to take the time to get to know them. Communicate with the kids as the emotionally evolved adult that you are – and be thoughtful of how you connect with them. There are so many benefits to having a positive relationship with her children.
Remember that a new person can leave a huge impact on a child, especially when they are at a very impressionable age. While establishing a parent-child relationship is not necessarily a top priority, show yourself as a trustworthy adult while you are dating your mother. That’s enough.
Let the child know that you care for their well-being. You want to be a positive part of their life, and you care about their thoughts and feelings about them and their mom. Also, let the kids know that you are willing to talk about more serious topics when they’re ready. Your relationship will develop with time, but it is incredibly important to establish yourself in a positive position with them while you date their mom.
7. Don’t Assume Single Moms’ Kids Need a New Dad There are many benefits to establishing a positive relationship with her children without necessarily having to jump into the expectations and responsibility of becoming their father. One of the many ways you can potentially ruin your relationship is to try and force yourself into a parental role.
No matter what their relationship is with their moms’ ex, do not force yourself into the responsibilities of fatherhood right away. Establish a positive relationship with her children and let them decide if they are interested in having you placed in a parental role in the future.
8. Let Her Know You Love Kids — Especially If You’re a Childless Man Some people have a hard time seeing that childless men can love children and want to be part of their lives. One of the many challenges many single moms face is finding potential partners who are willing to have the ability to care for their kids emotionally. Remember that it doesn’t matter who you are, her kids’ lives are going to be much more important to her than you are.
Dating a single mom means that you are going to be in the lives of these children and are very likely going to need to establish yourself as a positive influence on them. Children are a lot of fun and if you establish yourself as someone who loves children, you will have a much better chance of being with her.
Read full article
Singel Mom